FOLLY OF INNOCENCE: PART FIVE

Teenage Pregnancy

BY:

THE FLYING JOURNAL

October 04, 2011

Statistics in the United States show that each year, almost one million teenage women 10 percent of all women aged 15-19 and 19 percent of those who have had sexual intercourse become pregnant and one fourth of teenage mothers have a second child within two years of their first.

In the Philippines, according to the 2002 Young Adult Fertility and Sexuality Study by the University of the Philippines Institute (UPPI) and the Demographic Research and Development Foundation, 26 percent of our Filipino youth nationwide from ages 15 to 25 admitted to having a premarital sex experience.

What’s worse is that 38 percent of our youth are already in a live-in arrangement.

“Naay mga batan-on nga mo-engage nalang ug live-in relationship or magminyu nalang ug sayo kay tungod wala silay makita na purpose sa ilahang kinabuhi. Wa man sila’y laing mahuna-hunaan nga buhaton, compared sa mga bata or batan-on nga ni-eskwela. Gamay ra ang porsyento nga magka-interes sa paglaruy-laruy. Dili kaayo sila makahuna-huna sa ilahang mga uyab, kay daghan man sila ug mahuna-hunaan sa pag-eskwela,” (There are really teenagers that are prone to be in a live-in relationship or marrying at an early age because they don’t find any purpose in their life. They can’t think of anything compared to the teenagers who go to school. There are fewer chances that they will hang with friends. They don’t tend to think about their boyfriends or girlfriends because they occupied their time with school stuffs.)said Dr. Emmanuel Hernani, Cebu Normal University Guidance Counselor and Doctor of Psychology.

“Partly responsibilidad man gyud na sa ginikanan. Pero di ta ka blame sa mga ginikanan nga anaay anak nga gahi sad kaayo ug ulo.Kanang mga anak nga mosukol ug morebelde ug dili  musonud sa guide sa ilang mga ginikanan,” (Partly, it is the parents’ responsibility. But we cannot blame them of having a child who is stubborn. Especially children who are rebellious and do not obey their parents.)he added.

According to the studies conducted by World Bank, the Philippines is among the top 10 countries where there is an increasing number of teenage mothers. Seven out of 10 Filipina mothers are adolescents; most of them are below 19 years old.  There are 3.6 million young mothers in the Philippines to date. Evidently, these figures translate to a higher incidence of abortion in the country. Every year, an estimated total of 64,000 Filipino youth commit abortion.

While there is a prevalence of pregnancy among teens, it is still intensely unaccepted by the society—especially the parents. Because of this reason as well as their youth, adolescent mothers-to-be are more prone to stress. They suffer both physical and emotional pains.

Dr. Gloria Villena, Obstetrician-Gynecologist at Dr. Jose Fabella Memorial Hospital says that teenage pregnancy is risky because adolescents’ bodies are not yet fully-developed; bearing another child inside of them is precarious to their health.

“Giingnan na jud na nako si Carlo nga ayaw na jud paanaka si Geraldine,” (I already told Carlo not to impregnated Geraldine again.)said Gemma.

Based on the World Health Organization, teenage pregnancy may lead to various complications and risks:

Risk for malnutrition

Teenage mothers tend to have poor eating habits and are less likely to take recommended daily multivitamins to maintain adequate nutrition during pregnancy. They are also more likely to smoke, drink or take drugs during pregnancy, which can cause health problems for the baby.

 Risk for inadequate prenatal care

Teenage mothers are less likely to seek regular prenatal care which is essential for monitoring the growth of the fetus; keeping the mother’s weight in check; and advising the mother on nutrition and how she should take care of herself to ensure a healthy pregnancy. According to the American Medical Association, babies born to women who do not have regular prenatal care are 4 times more likely to die before the age of 1 year.

 Risk for abortion

Unplanned pregnancies lead to a higher rate of abortions. In the United States, nearly 4 in 10 teen pregnancies (excluding those ending in miscarriages) are terminated by abortion. There were about 274,000 abortions among teens in 1996.

In the Philippines, although abortion is illegal, it would shock you to know that we even have a higher abortion rate (25/1,000 women) compared to the United States where abortion is legal (23/1,000 women). For sure, there are more abortions that happen in our country that are not even reported. Backdoor abortions are resorted to with untrained hilots (midwives) with questionable sterility procedures, increasing the possibility for tetanus poisoning and other complications.

 Risk for fetal deaths

Statistics of the Department of Health show that fetal deaths are more likely to happen to young mothers and that babies born by them are likely to have low birth weight.

Risk for acquiring cervical cancer

The Human Papillomavirus (HPV) is a sexually-transmitted, wart-forming virus that has been implicated in causing cancer of the cervix. This is the most common cancer in women secondary to breast cancer. Women who are at increased risk for acquiring this are those who engage in sex before 18, have a pregnancy at or younger than 18, or have had at least 5 sexual partners, or have had a partner with at least 5 sexual partners.

How to prevent teen pregnancy?

1. Keep them at home with an intact family set up. The social institutions surrounding the youth jointly form a web of influence that either shield or lays them open to the lure of sexual risk-taking.

The family is one such social institution since an intact family with both parents raising the child was found to be correlated to less risk taking behavior by teens.

Those who left home early or were raised by separated parents were noted to engage in sex early and other risk taking behaviors. Family supervision and a stable parental union are associated with lesser chances of their children engaging in premarital sex.

2. Keep them in school. The other social institution that shields the youth from engaging in risk taking behavior is the school. Teens leaving school at an early age are more likely than other group of women to have their first sexual experience outside of marriage.

3. Keep talking to them. Increased parental communication decreases the likelihood of young Filipinos to engage in sexual risk-taking activities. It has been found that the mother, in particular, has a special role because their monitoring as well as open communication lines with their daughter were found to be associated with less chance for the teen to engage in intercourse or have fewer sexual partners.

4. Keep them morally and spiritually grounded. Over 80 percent of the 502 teens in a September poll told researchers that religion is important in their lives. Regardless of gender or race, survey results revealed that teens who attend religious services frequently are less likely to have permissive attitudes about sex.

Orienting them with the proper values early helps them imbibe it in their lives and keeps them from succumbing to peer pressure.

Preventing teen pregnancies requires a concerted effort on the part of the parents, the school and government. They need to insure that the right information is transmitted to children especially during their pre-teen years and that they are well-monitored and supported emotionally and psychologically. We can’t watch what our kids do all the time, but then again, we won’t have to if they are equipped to make better decisions for themselves.

Dr. Rebecca B. Singson holds clinics at the Makati Medical Center and at the Asian Hospital and Medical Center. She is an information advocate on issues related to the female reproductive organ and other women’s health issues.

FOLLY OF INNOCENCE: PART FOUR

The Community
BY:
THE FLYING JOURNAL
October 04, 2011

“Sa iyang nasugama karun, makaingonn ko nga iyang kinabuhi kay miserable. Kay sa
iyang pangidaron, dapat unta ni-eskwela pa na siya. Kay wala pa man ning abot ang
takna nga mahimo na siyang hinog para sa kaminyuon. Kanang right time o right age
ba sa kaminyuon,” (In her situation, I can say that her life is miserable, because at her
age, she should be in school. It is not her right time yet to be married.)said Jennifer dela
Cruz, 19, the neighbour of Geraldine.
She also added that in their place, there are lots of teenagers who engaged in the same
situation with Geraldine.
One is Angel Bontoyan, 16, who is pregnant and lives with her live-in partner who is of
the same age.
“Kung maibalik ko lang ang panahon, maghahanap ako ng trabaho tapos mag-aaral ako.
Ang hirap kasing magkaroon ng bata lalo na pag hindi ka pa handa,” (If I could turn back
the time, I will find a job and finish my studies. It’s so hard to have a child especially that
I am not yet ready.)said Angel with regret.
“Kasalanan ko talaga, ginusto ko kasi ang mag-asawa, eh. Ngayon ko namalayan, ang
hirap pala talaga,” (It’s really my fault; it was my decision to be in an early relationship.
Now I realize that it is really hard.)her realization.
The worst situation was her neighbour’s. Mary Jane Quining, 14, had died three days
after she gave birth. Their neighbour also said that her death was due to over fatigue.
Mark Jay, 19, the live-in partner still couldn’t accept the death of his beloved partner,
Mary.
Teenage pregnancy here in the Philippines is truly rampant. In fact, there are still
lots of related stories that have been discovered. Like the documentary of Bernadette
Sembrano, Krusada:Teenage Pregnancy, has revealed the story of a girl named “Angel”.
Bernadette met “Angel”, a 14-year-old girl who loves to dance and sing at videoke bars
as well as going out with friends. The youngest among 5 children, she was deemed as
the mother’s favorite. But she turned out to be her mother’s greatest disappointment.
Coming from a broken family, she left home and eloped with Allen whom she barely
even knew 7 months ago. After 3 months of living together, she got pregnant.
According to their neighbors, she aborted the baby. Angel opposes the accusation. She
says the miscarriage resulted when her mother beat her up badly when she told her
about her situation.
Pregnancy during the teenage years is a bombastic situation, one that comes
unexpected. For a student facing unintended pregnancy, the physical, emotional
and spiritual issues can seem overwhelming. Teenage pregnancy may have been the
result of the lack of supervision from parents, though blaming is nonetheless helpful if
pregnancy presents itself. They need more understanding and acceptance.
Who would lend a helping hand?
Would you lend a hand and save not only one but two lives instead of persecuting them?
Amazingly, Jesus did not accuse her or pick up a stone to throw at her. Instead, he
turned to her accusers and said, "Let the one who has never sinned throw the first
stone." One by one, the crowd left, and only the woman and Jesus remained. Jesus asked
her where her accusers had gone and whether any of them had condemned her. She
answered that they had not condemned her. Then Jesus said "Neither do I. Go and sin no
more," says in John 8:3-11

FOLLY OF INNOCENCE: PART THREE

Foolishness of Love
By:
The FLYING JOURNAL
October 04, 2011

Geraldine together with children and with her live-in partner Carlo clutches their youngest child.

At the age of 13, Geraldine chose to go with Carlo, who by then was 37.
Carlo is not a native Cebuano. He came from Bohol and has gone to Cebu to find a job.
In Bohol, he already had a child from his past live-in partner, whom he later deserted.
But when he met Geraldine in Talisay, Cebu, he chose to live with her permanently.
After a year of living together, Geraldine gave birth to their first born and was followed
successively, now, they already have three little children.
Carlo earns Php 100 to Php 200 everyday. But his wage depends on the number of
customers to be served per day. If there are lots of customers, the better, but if there are
only few, he earns less.
“Bugas jud dayon ang siguraduon ug palit,” (We secure to buy rice first.)Carlo added.
According to survey, the causes of early marriage or live-in relationships are usually
a combination of factors, among which are peer pressure, lack of self-esteem (desire
to feel lovable), general rebelliousness, selfishness and lack of quality parental
relationships (perhaps too authoritative or perhaps too permissive). The parental
relationships are, perhaps, the driving factor behind the other causes.
“Nagminyo nalang ko kay kapoy man gud sa balay. Daghan kaayo problema,” (I chose to
be with him because I’m tired to be in the house. Lot’s of problem.) Geraldine reasoned.
According to the recent survey, teenagers thought that escaping from their problems is
the only solution. But it made their life more miserable.
Teenage pregnancy has been defined predominantly within the research field and
among social agencies as a social problem. Poverty is associated with increased rates of
teenage pregnancy.
“Unsa man diay imong nakita ni Carlo nga mingkuyog man ka niya?” (What is it that you
saw in Carlo that you decided to go with him?)their neighbor had asked.
“Wala ra man,” (Nothing.)her reply.
“Tagaan ra ka kwarta ni Carlo noh? Katong manag-uyab pa mo?” (Does he give you
money when you were still boyfriend-girlfriend?) one neighbor tried to guess.
“Taga-an ra man ko niya ug kwarta. Ug isda sad,” (He gives me money and also fish.)her
honest reply.
The mother was asked by their neighbors, why they didn’t report this abuse since
Geraldine was minor age by then.
But the mother replied,” Wala ra mi ni report sa police. Buotan man na iyang bana.
Pinangga man na siya. Maayo ra man pud ang ilang pagpuyo,” (We didn’t report this to
the police because Carlo is kind to her. After all, they were able to live well.)the mother
clarified.

FOLLY OF INNOCENCE: PART TWO

The Family
By:
The FLYING JOURNAL
October 04, 2011

Remembering Geraldine was the only thing Gemma could do.

“September 2, 1993 man na nako siya gipanganak. Baghuay ra na siya nagdese-otso. Bata
palagi kaayo,” (It was September 2, 1993 when I gave birth to her. She just turned 18.
She’s still so young.)said Geraldine’s mother with a feeling of loss.
“Wala naman sad koy mabuhat anang iyang kahimtang. Iya man na nga kagustuhan,” (I
cannot do anything about her situation right now. It’s her decision.)
All mothers always have special feelings and attention for their children – of course!
They carried their child nine months in their womb and did so much sacrifice on the
growth and development of their children.
Mother’s play a vital role in keeping their children healthy by sustaining their physical
needs, giving them sufficient care, emotional support and providing them time for
learning.
“Sauna, dili siya maminaw nako. Magsige lang lakaw, dili mapuyo sa balay. Karon nga
nagkapamilya na, karon pa hinuon motabang-tabang sa bulohaton,” (Before, she doesn’t
listen. She keeps on hanging. Now, that she already has her own family, it is only then
she knew in helping house chores.)Geraldine’s mother recalled.
Parents, because they know best, are to be trusted regarding decisions directly affecting
the child. Parents’ decisions regarding their children are to be upheld even if they are
in direct opposition to the child’s own choices. Thus, children are hardly ever consulted
when any decision affecting them has to be made. This practice rests on the cultural
assumption that no parent wishes harm on their children (walang masamang hangad
ang magulang sa kanyang anak).
In Philippines’ society (as in many societies around the world), the child is thought to
be passive, dependent and vulnerable. This is embodied in descriptions of children
as walang-isip, walang alam, walang-malay (mindless, know-nothings, innocent), and
therefore needs protection.
“Limpyada man jud na siya. Gahi lang jud ug ulo, di magpatuo,” (She’s neat though, but
hard headed.)Gemma confessed.
The role of the family therefore is to mould the child into a socially responsible adult
through providing him with her basic needs (which includes a good education),
instilling discipline, and protecting her from harm and undesirable influences.
So what kind of family does Geraldine have?
Geraldine Alvarez is the seventh daughter of Boy and Gemma Alvarez. Her oldest
brother is already 26, married, while the youngest is four years old. Only one pursued
schooling and is already in her fourth grade in elementary, two died, which now makes
them eleven.
Her family lived in a nipa house.
Her father is a pedicab driver while her mother earns in making dried fish.
According to studies, one of the key advantages to belonging to a close family group
is the security it affords and individual -- or the group collectively -- when it comes
to financial security. In times of individual hardship, an individual is often supported
economically by members of his family group, thus shielding him from the hardships
of temporary or long-term economic misfortune. A disadvantage to this can be that,
consciously or subconsciously, the individual may depend or rely on this support and
become complacent. This may strain family relationships, and individuals may not
strive to succeed as much as they would if they had no family support.
“Maka-kaon man gihapon mi ug katulo sa usa ka adlaw,” (We can still eat three times a
day.)said Geraldine’s mother.
So what then drove Geraldine to go with a man?
“Ambot ana niya. Naa man jud na siyay in ana nga batasan. Bisan unsaon pa nako ug
ingon nga dili, moadto man jud siya sa lalaki. Bisan apason pa nako, motago man sad,”
(I don’t with her. She really possesses that kind of attitude. No matter how I tell hear
not to, but still goes to that man. Even if I follow her and bring her back home, she hid
herself to me.)said Geraldine’s mother who’s worn-out of advising Geraldine.
The role of parents in a child’s life is an irreplaceable one.
The relationship that parents share with their children is one that impacts a child
throughout his or her lifetime.
“Even when young children spend most of their waking hours in child care, parents
remain the most influential adults in their lives,” writes Dr. Jack Shonkoff, a board-
certified pediatrician who sits on the faculty of the Harvard Graduate School of
Education.
“A child may not care who cuts her hair or takes her money at the toy store, but the
parents really care a great deal about who is holding her when she is unsure, comforts
her when she is hurt, and shares special moments in her life,” he continues.
“Amo man na siya gipa-eskwela. Nya ming-undang man dayon. Dili na ginahan mobalik
ug eskwela,” (We sent her to school but she immediately stopped. Then she doesn’t want
to go back to so school.)added the mother.
Studies show that the benefits of parental involvement are manifold, affecting
numerous areas of a child’s life, including health and development, academic progress,
and life choices.
The role of parents in the lives of their children has, historically, been one of
unquestioned value, celebrated in cultures around the world. And the rights that come
along with that—to direct the upbringing and education of one’s own children—have
been consistently honored and upheld.
The Supreme Court has maintained that parents possess a fundamental constitutional
right to raise their children as they see fit. “The child is not the mere creature of the
State,” the Supreme Court concluded in a 1925 ruling,” those who nurture her and direct
his destiny have the right, coupled with the high duty, to recognize and prepare her for
additional obligations.”
“Bisan dili namo siya sugtan, molakaw man jud siya adto sa lalaki. Presuhon nako
sa balay, mogawas man jud. Gikapoy nako ana niya oy! Mao ng amo nalang siyang
gipaundayunan,” Even if we already forbid her, still she wants to go to that man. We
tried to imprison her in the house, still she tries to escape. I’m worn-out with her. So, we
just let her.) Geraldine’s mother already tired telling Geraldine what to do.

FOLLY OF INNOCENCE: PART ONE

A Girl Who Doesn’t Know How to Dream

( Feature Sory)

By:

The FLYING JOURNAL

October 04, 2011

Geraldine’s eyes are out of the blue, curling her youngest child. She doesn’t remember her birthday.

TANKE, TALISAY CITY, CEBU—A two-door rental house, at first sight, someone would
think of it as a normal home for a family. But as you try to venture in one of those doors,
lies a figure of a woman, one neighbor said.

Everyone thinks that she’s already a woman, but she’s not, and to think of it, she’s just a
girl who was blinded by poverty, another neighbor clarified.

It was September 14, 2011, about 8:30 in the evening, a silhouette of a girl appeared
before the darkness of the night.

She was chopping some woods to add to the burning ember and to be able to sustain it.

The burning flame was being started by teared pages of chemistry book which she
doesn’t even know its significance.

Everyone knew in their place that this is the girl’s routine every time she prepares for
their supper.

The girl left the rice that she was cooking.

The smell of the overcooked rice prompted a man to come out from the house and get
the little cauldron.

He is Carlo Albura, 39, he could be mistaken as the father of the girl, anyone could tell.

"Dili oy! Dili man na amo papa. Kapuyo man na sa ako ate," (No! He’s not our father. He’s
my sister’s live-in partner.)Nina Alvarez, 9, the younger sister of the girl explained.

Carlo works in one of the vulcanizing shops in Mandaue City. He leaves for work as early
as 7 a.m. and returns at 9 p.m. The girl, on the other hand, washes their clothes, dishes
and cleans the house, after Carlo leaves for work.

Every night, the family struggles to kindle fire, needed to cook their food and to give
light in their dark little place called home.

It could be a typical day, for a typical family.

September 17, 2011, about 10 a.m., the girl did their laundry and hung their clothes on
the bamboo fence.

Later that day, the girl was curling underneath her chest is a life, sucking the milk she
could offer from her breast.

This girl, but already a mother, her neighbor had said, was Geraldine Alvarez.

She just turned 18, the early month of September, her mother had said.

But as you thought that was the only child, Geraldine already bore three children. That
child she was carrying was the youngest.

The eldest son, Gerald, is three years old. The second child is Melody, two years old. And
the youngest is Kim, 1 year old.

Geraldine is a woman of few words. But sometimes doesn’t answer someone’s question,
one neighbor commented.

"Ana ko niya, adto mi sa health center para magpa-prenatal. Unya moduko ra jud intawn
siya. Way tingog-tingog, gibiyaan ra ko, then nilakaw," (I told her that we will go to
the health center for prenatal. But she just stooped and walked away without saying
anything.)said Tessie dela Cruz, her concerned neighbor.

She’s now 18, yet she can’t even easily understand words uttered to her. And she can’t
even remember her birthday.

One day, a neighbor asked her, "Unsa may damgo nimo sa imong kinabuhi, day?" (What
are your dreams in life?)

"Wala ra man. Kontento na ko," (Nothing. I’m already contented.) she answered briefly.

"Kung mabalik pa lang ang panahon, unsa man imong ginahan nga usbon?" (If you could
turn back time, what would you like to change?)

She purses her lips and remained silent.

She was asked if she wants to pursue her studies. But her only reply was that, she
doesn’t want to continue in going to school because of her experience way back in her
first grade.

At 13, Geraldine ventured in a world totally lost for her. She quit schooling, not even
Grade-I whom she later said was due to bullying. She said that her classmates bit and
punched her.

She tried to tell this to her teacher, but she was just ignored.

Women exposed to abuse domestic violence, and family strife in childhood are more
likely to become pregnant as teenagers, and the risk of becoming pregnant as a teenager
increases with the number of adverse childhood experiences. According to a 2004
study, one-third of teenage pregnancies could be prevented by eliminating exposure
to abuse, violence, and family strife. The researchers note that "family dysfunction has
enduring and unfavorable health consequences for women during the adolescent years,
the childbearing years, and beyond." When the family environment does not include
adverse childhood experiences, this will lead to negative psychosocial consequences.

"Nagmahay ka karon nga nagminyo ka ug sayo?" (Did you regret marrying at an early
age?)

"Wala ra man, Okay ra." (No. It’s okay.)

"Unsa man jud imo panganduy? Mag-nurse o mag-teacher?" (What would you prefer, to
be a nurse or a teacher?)

"Motrabaho," (Work)she immediately answered.

"Unsa man sad imong ginahan nga trabaho?" (What work do you like then?)interestingly
asked the neighbor.

"Ari ra. Manglaba," (Just here. Doing laundry)her short response.

"Nya kung wala na kay labhunon?" (What if you don’t have anymore to laundry?)added
the neighbor.

"Naa ra sa balay, manghan-ay sa mga gamit," (Just here in the house. Arranging things)
her reply.

The neighbor also asked, if she has a hobby like singing or dancing, as her past time.

But she only nodded and said she doesn’t have time and interest of doing so.

What makes her special?

BAKIT AKO PA?

(Narativ Diskors)

       Nang ako’y maliit pa, marami na akong gusto sa buhay. Nasa elementarya pa lang ako, pangarap ko nang maging mang-aawit o ‘di kaya’y maging abogado. Sabi ng lola ko, bagay daw sa akin ang maging abogado. Sapagkat matalino raw ako sa klase. Tama nga naman ang lola ko, samakatuwid honor student ako mula sa unang baiting hanggang ako ay nakapagtapos sa elementarya. Pero hindi ako sigurado sa tatahakin kong buhay kapag ako ay malaki na.Kung mang-aawit ba ako o maging abogado? Iyan ang hindi tiyak.

Lumipas ang mga araw, buwan at taon, hindi ko na namalayan ang mabilis na pagtakbo ng panahon. Biruin mo, parang kailan lang maliit pa ako noon sa elementarya at tumatahak na naman ako sa sekondaryang paaralan. Unang taon, ikalawang taon at ikatlong taon, kay dali ng taon ko sa hayskul. Ngunit meron akong napansin na parang hindi sumasabay sa bilis ng pagbabago ng aking buhay. Noon, hindi ko lang ito pinapansin. Akala ko kasi magbabago lang ito kapag ako ay nakapagtapos na sa hayskul. Natapos ko na lang ang ikaapat na taon, hindi ko pa rin nakita ang pagbabago. At ang inaasam ko na pagbabagong ito ay unti-unting humihila sa akin pababa. Simula na ang unti-unting pagkawala ng tiwala ko sa sarili. Tila nadarama ko sa kaibuturan ng puso ko na kulang ako.

       "Gee, bakit parang hindi ka yata tumatangkad?" pabirong puna ng aking mga kaklase. Ito ang tanong ng mga tao kapag nalaman nilang 4’9 lang ako at patapos na ang teenage years ko. Tinatawanan ko lang ito, pero sa puso’t isipan ko, kumukurot ito sa aking pagkatao. Lalo na’t papasok na ako sa kolehiyo, parang bata pa rin akong tingnan. "Pansin ko nga rin, sa ating magkakapatid, ikaw lang ang pandak!" pabulalas na sabi ng aking Kuya. Iyan rin ang kumikintal na katanungan sa aking isipan. Bakit ako pa? "Paano na ang pangarap kong maging singer? Hindi kaaya-aya sa isang singer ang pandak. O ‘di kaya’y lawyer na pandak! Ang pangit namang tingnan. Tiyak na hindi ako rerespetuhin lalo na’t sa liit kong ito, maiisip talaga ng iba na ako ay bata pa," dagdag ko sa ‘di mabuti kong pag-iisip.

       Hindi lingid sa aking kaalaman na ang pag-iisip kong ito ay magdudulot lamang ng kasamaan sa aking pananaw sa kinabukasan. At dumating ang isang pagkakataon, tila ako ay tinawag ng Diyos na magtrabaho para sa Kanya. Bakasyon iyon sa taong 2010 buwan ng Mayo, ako ay sumali at nagtrabaho bilang Literature Evangelist (LE). Ang trabaho ng isang LE ay naglilibot kahit saan, kumakatok sa mga pintuan ng mga tahanan habang dala-dala ang mga selyong libro ng Diyos tungkol sa pag-ibig, pamilya, kalusugan, propesiya, paniniwala at iba pa. Dahil sa trabahong ito marami akong nakilala at naging kaibigan. Napagtanto ko na mas masahol pa ang mga problemang dinaranas ng ibang tao kaysa sa akin. Hindi pa nga kumakalahati ang bigat na pinapasan nila kaysa sa akin. Ang aking tangkad lang ang pinobroblema ko, sa kanila ang kabuuan ng buhay nila ang kanilang pinoproblema. May kasamahan nga ako sa trabaho, sobrang taas niya, 6 na talampakan, pero hindi naman buo ang kaniyang pamilya. May isa pa, matangkad siya kaysa sa akin, pero may taning naman ang kaniyang buhay. Ang laki ng pasasalamat ko sa Puong Maykapal na malakas at malusog ako, hindi katulad ng iba. At lalung-lalo na, may kumpleto at masayahin akong pamilya na malapit sa Diyos, hindi katulad ng iba. Dito ko napagtanto na, kung akala mo pasan mo na ang buong mundo, may iba pa palang tao na mas karapat-dapat na mag-isip ng ganito. Pero natutunan ko na walang ibinibigay na pagsubok ang Diyos na hindi natin makakaya.

       Ang karanasan ko sa buhay ay muling nagpatibay sa akin. Hanggang ako ay nakapasa sa prestihiyosong unibersidad ng Cebu Normal, ang kabuwayan ko sa aking layog ay unti-unting nawawaglit sa aking isipan. "Totoo talaga ang kasabihang, ‘Small but terrible’," pagkamanghang sabi ng aking propesor sa maganda kong presentasyon sa klase. Hindi man matupad ang kahilingan kong tumangkad, mas ipinagdarasal ko ang pagtaas at paglawak ng aking pananalig sa Diyos. Dahil kung ang Diyos ang uunahin mo, tiyak na makukuntento ka na sa iyong buhay. Mas dapat nating isipin at tanungin ang ating sarili, na sa pamumuhay ko dito sa mundo, may mabuti ba akong nagawa sa aking kapwa tao? Hindi puro sariling kagalakan?

       Mas naiintindihan ko na ngayon ang buhay, lalo na’t may patnubay ng Maykapal. Bilang isa sa mga kabataan sa ating lipunan na may maraming pinagdaraanan, dapat atupagin muna ang kagalingan bilang isang kapaki-pakinabang na nilalang sa mundo. Nakasaad sa 1 Timothy 4:12 "Huwag hayaan ang mga tao na abain ang iyon kabataan, ngunit maging isang halimbawa sa iyong paniniwala, sa salita, sa pag-uusap, sa kawanggawa, sa espiritu, sa pananampalataya at sa kadalisayan."